Attachment Theory

Attachment Theory

                           Since the day we are born, we tend to expect certain things from that one specific person who shows love, care and affection for us. As time goes, we get more depended on that person, emotionally and physically and that dependency and the bond that keeps us tied to that person is known as Attachment. And to help us learn how the whole “Attachment” works and progresses in one’s life, John Bowlby explained it in depth in this book; Attachment Theory.

                             From the moment babies are born, they seek security and love from responsive parents and caregivers. During infancy, humans begin to develop what may eventually become lifelong patterns of interdependence with one another. Indeed, the earliest attachments are enacted through proximity-seeking behaviors; the cries or grasping of infants are an adaptive response to an otherwise uncertain world, ensuring protection from a caregiver and the resulting survival that such security affords. While early attachment figures are typically caregivers providing for the physical and/or safety needs of an infant or young child, attachment bonds are also formed throughout adolescence and adulthood. Just as infants turn to caregivers in times of distress or uncertainty, adolescents and adults tend to turn to a specific individual when they need affirmation related to security, closeness, or intimacy. This attachment bond is typically characterized by an enduring affiliation with an attachment figure through both good and bad episodes in the relationship; the bond is often so enduring that perceptions of grief and loss often occur if the affiliation is somehow severed. Adult attachment bonds have been found to occur in close relationships such as close friendships, sibling relationships, parent–child relationships, and even the occasional patient–therapist relationship. The strongest attachment bond that adults may experience, however, is the pairing between romantic partners.

Much like other attachment pairings, one’spattern of relating within adult romantic relationships is heavily influenced by one’s early relational experiences. Scholars have distilled the broad range of individual attachment behaviors into four distinct patterns;

·        Secure Attachment: The secure pattern of attachment is characterized by a strong sense of self-worth. Secure individuals are confident in their relational status and are typically found to rate quite high on the four key relational characteristics of commitment, trust, interdependence, and satisfaction.

“I am Okay and you are Okay too.”

·        Preoccupied Attachment:  These preoccupied individuals fear abandonment from their attachment figures and typically over monitor their relationships with these figures.

“I’m not Okay but you are Okay.”

·        Dismissive Attachment: The dismissive pattern of attachment is characterized by individuals with not only a high level of self-worth, but also an equally low level of trust for other individuals.

“I’m Okay but you are not.”

·        Fearful Avoidant Attachment: The fearful avoidant pattern of attachment is characterized by both avoidance of intimacy and anxiety about forming attachments.

“I’m not Okay and you are not Okay.”

                   The attachment theory argues that one’s early relational experiences have a significant impact on one’s manner of navigating one’s social world. The expressions of these individual differences often group into one of four general attachment patterns, which in turn may influence both process and outcome variables related to how one acts within many close or romantic relationships.