Attachment
Theory
Since the day we are
born, we tend to expect certain things from that one specific person who shows
love, care and affection for us. As time goes, we get more depended on that
person, emotionally and physically and that dependency and the bond that keeps
us tied to that person is known as Attachment. And to help us learn how the
whole “Attachment” works and progresses in one’s life, John Bowlby explained it
in depth in this book; Attachment Theory.

From the moment babies are
born, they seek security and love from responsive parents and caregivers. During infancy, humans begin to develop what may eventually
become lifelong patterns of interdependence with one another. Indeed, the earliest
attachments are enacted through proximity-seeking behaviors; the cries or
grasping of infants are an adaptive response to an otherwise uncertain world,
ensuring protection from a caregiver and the resulting survival that such security
affords. While early attachment figures are typically caregivers providing for
the physical and/or safety needs of an infant or young child, attachment bonds
are also formed throughout adolescence and adulthood. Just as infants turn to
caregivers in times of distress or uncertainty, adolescents and adults tend to
turn to a specific individual when they need affirmation related to security,
closeness, or intimacy. This attachment bond is typically characterized by an enduring
affiliation with an attachment figure through both good and bad episodes in the
relationship; the bond is often so enduring that perceptions of grief and loss
often occur if the affiliation is somehow severed. Adult attachment bonds have
been found to occur in close relationships such as close friendships, sibling
relationships, parent–child relationships, and even the occasional
patient–therapist relationship. The strongest attachment bond that adults may experience,
however, is the pairing between romantic partners.
Much like other attachment pairings, one’spattern of relating
within adult romantic relationships is heavily influenced by one’s early relational
experiences. Scholars have distilled the broad range of individual attachment
behaviors into four distinct patterns;
·
Secure
Attachment: The secure
pattern of attachment is characterized by a
strong sense of self-worth. Secure individuals are confident in their relational status and are
typically found to rate quite high on the four key relational characteristics
of commitment, trust, interdependence, and satisfaction.
“I
am Okay and you are Okay too.”
·
Preoccupied
Attachment: These
preoccupied individuals fear abandonment from their attachment figures and
typically over monitor their relationships with these figures.
“I’m not Okay but you are Okay.”
·
Dismissive
Attachment: The dismissive
pattern of attachment is characterized by
individuals with not only a high level of self-worth, but also an equally low
level of trust for other individuals.
“I’m Okay but you are not.”
·
Fearful
Avoidant Attachment: The fearful
avoidant pattern of attachment is characterized by
both avoidance of intimacy and anxiety about forming attachments.
“I’m
not Okay and you are not Okay.”
The attachment
theory argues that one’s early relational experiences have a significant impact
on one’s manner of navigating one’s social world. The expressions of these
individual differences often group into one of four general attachment patterns,
which in turn may influence both process and outcome variables related to how
one acts within many close or romantic relationships.